Today it has been 3 months and 5 days since my mom passed away. I just haven't wanted to or felt like there was anything to write until tonight. Grief is a weird thing. One moment I feel like myself, the next I feel like my world is falling apart. I guess I am still me with a sad side, with a missing piece. Sometimes I get lost laughing or thinking of the future, and then it feels like the wind is knocked out of me when I remember that she is gone. That no moment in my future will truly be happy without her there to share it. The days go by quickly and it doesn't get easier, but instead it's begun to feel like a bad dream. The moments in the hospital feel distant even though I can remember each detail of each moment. I wish I could blur that part out. I wish I could only remember the beautiful, happy times with my mom. I wish I could only remember the smile on her face and not the pain or sadness in her eyes while she was sick.
Our family is functioning. We smile and remember the funny moments with my mom. We sort of avoid talking about how much we miss her with each other because it goes without saying. I know certain things remind Emily of my mom at the exact time they do for me. We don't need to say it. I don't think more than 10 minutes goes by that I don't think about her. I pray that I will see her in my dreams, but I have only had two dreams about her and neither was of happy times.
People say you always feel your loved one with you. I have been searching to feel my mom with me since she passed away. I honestly don't know if she is with us. I do believe she is in Heaven but don't know if she has any way of seeing us or looking out for us. I wish she did, and I wish I could feel her presence every second. I think we have this expectation of what it feels like to lose someone based on books and movies about the afterlife. It's more empty than I expected.
I try to think of how busy my mom always was, how she got married and had kids so young. Today I looked at a picture hanging on my Grandma's wall of our family in 1992. My mom was already married had two kids by the age of 27. It just reminded me of the way she always seized each and every day. She never waited around unsure of her decisions the way I do. She lived. She gardened, she taught, she read good books, she went to farmers markets, she brought us on vacations. She was a great example of how to make the most of every day. I can't remember a single day that she ever just sat on the couch. I know that she definitely was not ready to end her life on Earth, but I am thankful that she did so much while she was here, and that she touched so many lives.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Thank you
We have so many amazing friends and family members. Thank you all for coming to the memorial service yesterday! The turnout was amazing and we appreciate people letting us know how much my mom meant to everyone. Thank you to everyone who has sent flowers for the services and to our home. Thank you for the edible arrangements and tons of other goodies. Thank you for the beautiful, heartfelt cards. Thank you for the dinners and other little favors. I am just in shock at how kind and caring people are. I don't think I could ever thank each of you enough, but our family will most certainly pay it forward when others are in pain because we know what a difference it has made in our experience.
The memorial yesterday was perfect. I want to especially thank the St. Christopher school, staff, and community for letting us have the service and banquet there and for helping with all of the delicious food. Also, thank you to Mrs. Walker and Mrs. Burdett for organizing everything. You are amazing! The banquet was so much more than we expected. It gave us the opportunity to hear memories of my mom and to reunite with people we haven't seen in years. Hearing the stories and details people remember about my mom was so reassuring and such a tribute to her life. Seeing her students so upset and hearing parents say she changed their child's life was inspiring. I cannot thank you all enough for sharing those memories. It was good to remember the happy and fun times. Love you all!
The memorial yesterday was perfect. I want to especially thank the St. Christopher school, staff, and community for letting us have the service and banquet there and for helping with all of the delicious food. Also, thank you to Mrs. Walker and Mrs. Burdett for organizing everything. You are amazing! The banquet was so much more than we expected. It gave us the opportunity to hear memories of my mom and to reunite with people we haven't seen in years. Hearing the stories and details people remember about my mom was so reassuring and such a tribute to her life. Seeing her students so upset and hearing parents say she changed their child's life was inspiring. I cannot thank you all enough for sharing those memories. It was good to remember the happy and fun times. Love you all!
Friday, March 23, 2012
Memorial
Today has been a rough day for me. Just woke up feeling sad. I keep remembering little details about my mom like the way she put on her lipstick or how she would spend the entire day outside gardening on days like today. I would get so annoyed at her for being out there all day, but now I wish I had helped her and enjoyed those days. I know she would have loved this weather. After gardening she probably would have sat on the swinging chair and read a book.
I was so touched to see that her school is planning on setting up several memorials in her honor. I read this online in the Nashua Telegraph. A teacher's wife painted a picture of her for the school library. Also, they are still figuring out what they are going to do but some ideas have been to set up a scholarship for a high school student who wants to go into education or having a fund for students who cannot afford field trips or having a brick or special bench at the school in her honor. I especially like the idea of a fund for field trips because my mom often had students who couldn't afford the cost of field trips and she would use her own money so they could go. I think one time she even paid for a student to go to summer camp during the summer because she thought he was a special kid who could do great things with the right opportunities. She did so many good things and wanted no recognition for any of the things she did. What a wonderful person. I hope people will do kind little things in her honor.
Tomorrow is the memorial service at St. Christopher Catholic Church in Nashua. It will be at 11am. I look forward to seeing everyone else who loved her!
I was so touched to see that her school is planning on setting up several memorials in her honor. I read this online in the Nashua Telegraph. A teacher's wife painted a picture of her for the school library. Also, they are still figuring out what they are going to do but some ideas have been to set up a scholarship for a high school student who wants to go into education or having a fund for students who cannot afford field trips or having a brick or special bench at the school in her honor. I especially like the idea of a fund for field trips because my mom often had students who couldn't afford the cost of field trips and she would use her own money so they could go. I think one time she even paid for a student to go to summer camp during the summer because she thought he was a special kid who could do great things with the right opportunities. She did so many good things and wanted no recognition for any of the things she did. What a wonderful person. I hope people will do kind little things in her honor.
Tomorrow is the memorial service at St. Christopher Catholic Church in Nashua. It will be at 11am. I look forward to seeing everyone else who loved her!
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Home
We decided to come home today because we finally felt ready. Thank you to all of you who sent us flowers and cards. Your kind words really did help. We got so many cards that we still have many to open, but it gives us something to do rather than sit around and feel sorry for ourselves. Thank you especially to Mrs. Walker, Mrs. Burdett and Jackie for cleaning our house, providing us with food, and taking care of our crazy dogs! You guys are amazing!!! And thanks to the Rougeau's for watching my little dog/son!
We received a letter from my mom's oncologist and it was really special. He said that he had never seen a patient as gentle and kind as my mom. He also said that he had never seen a family as close and supportive as ours was. He shared information about his own family's loss several years ago. The letter was so meaningful to us. No doctor is required to go out of his way like that, but we appreciate it so much.
Today while flying home on the plane, I kept looking out the window, staring at the clouds. Flying has always made me realize how small each of us really is and how big the universe is. Every little part of our bodies, every little piece of the Earth is so detailed and works in perfect harmony. God is greater than we could ever imagine and if you stop to think about the little details that we take for granted each day, like a tree growing from a seed or a baby being born, you can see all of God's miracles. We cannot even comprehend what he has in store for each of us or how amazing heaven is. We cannot even fathom all of the colors and sights there. And though it's so hard to not know exactly what my mom is experiencing or what she is seeing, I trust that she is there, and I feel peace knowing she is in peace! I love this video about a little girl raised in an agnostic family who began drawing and painting images of heaven. I believe God reaches out to each of us in different ways, ways he knows will be best for us. Just thought I would share :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49wut32Cguw
P.S. I appreciate that many people are still reading the blog! I only like to write when I feel positive or inspired or else I would write more often. Of course there are many days where I feel sad and angry, but I don't think people would like to read those posts as much ;) and I'd rather share positive energy!
We received a letter from my mom's oncologist and it was really special. He said that he had never seen a patient as gentle and kind as my mom. He also said that he had never seen a family as close and supportive as ours was. He shared information about his own family's loss several years ago. The letter was so meaningful to us. No doctor is required to go out of his way like that, but we appreciate it so much.
Today while flying home on the plane, I kept looking out the window, staring at the clouds. Flying has always made me realize how small each of us really is and how big the universe is. Every little part of our bodies, every little piece of the Earth is so detailed and works in perfect harmony. God is greater than we could ever imagine and if you stop to think about the little details that we take for granted each day, like a tree growing from a seed or a baby being born, you can see all of God's miracles. We cannot even comprehend what he has in store for each of us or how amazing heaven is. We cannot even fathom all of the colors and sights there. And though it's so hard to not know exactly what my mom is experiencing or what she is seeing, I trust that she is there, and I feel peace knowing she is in peace! I love this video about a little girl raised in an agnostic family who began drawing and painting images of heaven. I believe God reaches out to each of us in different ways, ways he knows will be best for us. Just thought I would share :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49wut32Cguw
P.S. I appreciate that many people are still reading the blog! I only like to write when I feel positive or inspired or else I would write more often. Of course there are many days where I feel sad and angry, but I don't think people would like to read those posts as much ;) and I'd rather share positive energy!
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Already missing you...
I don't know that anyone will continue to read this but it helps me to write things down. And maybe if I can make even one person more thankful for their own life, then this post is meaningful. I know too that my mom liked my posts. She didn't read the blog often but I was just looking through old texts from her and found one that said she had just read my blog and it lifted her spirits and changed her attitude. I don't really want the world to forget her either so I will write.
I keep thinking today of all the silly things people complain about- the weather, work, school. I do it too. But today we buried my beautiful, vibrant mother. That is a real problem to complain about, and to be honest we barely have. I am in awe of each of my family member's strength and trust in God through this experience. I think that while each of us hits lows and questions God, we know that He has a bigger plan than any of us could imagine. Our strength comes from Him. I fully believe that He has a plan and that there was a purpose for my mom's death. It will take a lot of patience, strength and faith to get us where we need to be and for us to see the big picture but I believe we will get there.
Today was difficult to say the least, but our family felt like everything went perfectly. The service was beautiful; the cemetery was peaceful; we were surrounded by people who truly love us and my mom. We continue to recognize the blessings. Since my mom's diagnosis I pictured this day in my head. I would push the thoughts away because it hurt too bad. But today those images became reality and it was more peaceful than I could have imagined because I really believe she is in heaven. I could have never in a million years have imagined that this would be our life. How could this happen to our perfect family, our young mother, our best friend? But who ever does expect it? You could drive yourself crazy trying to fugure out "why me"? It happened and there was nothing we could have changed or done differently. So now we have two options- we change for the worse and lose who we are and who she wanted us to be, or we live for her and find our purpose like she did. It is not going to be an easy road, but we continue to remind ourselves that WE are the ones who are suffering. She is living in a perfect world with so much love, where she deserves to be. I know there are so many difficult days to come, going home to our house that she made a home, our weddings, our babies, holidays. Every day will be a struggle, and we will miss her and long to speak with her more than I could ever describe. But we will continue to remember her and honor her by telling funny stories about her and sharing our memories. And we will rely on family and friends, our gifts from God, to help us get through each day. We love and thank you all for your support, especially those of you who flew all the way to FL to be with us and honor my wonderful mother. She truly was special and gifted in many ways!
I keep thinking today of all the silly things people complain about- the weather, work, school. I do it too. But today we buried my beautiful, vibrant mother. That is a real problem to complain about, and to be honest we barely have. I am in awe of each of my family member's strength and trust in God through this experience. I think that while each of us hits lows and questions God, we know that He has a bigger plan than any of us could imagine. Our strength comes from Him. I fully believe that He has a plan and that there was a purpose for my mom's death. It will take a lot of patience, strength and faith to get us where we need to be and for us to see the big picture but I believe we will get there.
Today was difficult to say the least, but our family felt like everything went perfectly. The service was beautiful; the cemetery was peaceful; we were surrounded by people who truly love us and my mom. We continue to recognize the blessings. Since my mom's diagnosis I pictured this day in my head. I would push the thoughts away because it hurt too bad. But today those images became reality and it was more peaceful than I could have imagined because I really believe she is in heaven. I could have never in a million years have imagined that this would be our life. How could this happen to our perfect family, our young mother, our best friend? But who ever does expect it? You could drive yourself crazy trying to fugure out "why me"? It happened and there was nothing we could have changed or done differently. So now we have two options- we change for the worse and lose who we are and who she wanted us to be, or we live for her and find our purpose like she did. It is not going to be an easy road, but we continue to remind ourselves that WE are the ones who are suffering. She is living in a perfect world with so much love, where she deserves to be. I know there are so many difficult days to come, going home to our house that she made a home, our weddings, our babies, holidays. Every day will be a struggle, and we will miss her and long to speak with her more than I could ever describe. But we will continue to remember her and honor her by telling funny stories about her and sharing our memories. And we will rely on family and friends, our gifts from God, to help us get through each day. We love and thank you all for your support, especially those of you who flew all the way to FL to be with us and honor my wonderful mother. She truly was special and gifted in many ways!
Monday, March 12, 2012
Change in funeral plans
The visitation is still going to be the same but the church location has been changed. The service will now be held at St. Cecelia church at 830 Jasmine Way, Clearwater, FL. It will still be at 10 am on Tuesday.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Funeral Arrangements
The visitations will be at Curlew Hills Memory Gardens in Palm Harbor, FL on Monday March 12th from 2pm to 4pm and also 6pm to 8pm. The address is 1750 Curlew Road Palm Harbor, Florida. The funeral services will be held Tuesday March 13th at 10am at Countryside Baptist Church located at 2525 McMullen Booth Road, Clearwater, FL 33761. Followed by the burial back at Curlew Hills Memory Garden. We will also have a memorial service for her in NH when we return from FL. All are welcome. It will be on March 24th at St. Christopher's School Church at 20 Cushing Avenue Nashua, NH at 11am.
My mom will be buried close to her nephew whom she loved so much, Jimmy Spicer. She helped plan his funeral in March 7 years ago and loved that cemetery. Florida was where her heart was--in the sun and near the Gulf of Mexico.
My mom will be buried close to her nephew whom she loved so much, Jimmy Spicer. She helped plan his funeral in March 7 years ago and loved that cemetery. Florida was where her heart was--in the sun and near the Gulf of Mexico.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Heaven
Psalm 23
The LORD is my shepherd,
I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
He restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.
Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
This morning my mom went to Jesus and God. She was not in pain when she went. My dad was by her side praying and told her if God was calling to her then she could go. She went soon after. She was not in pain because they intubated her yesterday and had her on sedatives. They said she could probably hear us. I know that she knows how much each of us love her. I didn't feel like there was anything I could have said to her that she already didn't know. She was the most kind, caring, beautiful person I have ever met and ever will meet. I think of all of the selfless things she did for our family and how much she taught each one of us. She was so moral, a genuinely GOOD person and a wonderful teacher. I am proud to call her my mother and will aspire to be like her every day that I live. She was the kind of person who would drop off Christmas gifts anonymously to a student in her class who was going through a hard time. Or go out of her way to make an unconfident student feel special and beautiful. She truly touched and changed lives every day that she lived.
Emily today said that each of us has a piece of her in us. Emily has her nurturing, empathetic qualities that made her so kind to others. Dani has her knack for making things beautiful and special with attention to detail and creativity. I like to think I have some of her ability to give advice to others in need. My dad has all of her and will continue to teach us things we never knew about her before. I find comfort in being with her mother, my Nana, who always knows what to say and my Pop-pop who she got her sense of humor from. Her brother Brian is funny like her and has so many similar traits that remind me of her. These people are so special because they are a piece of her.
I truly know that above all my mom wants us to be happy. That has been her goal since the day I was born. I could not ask for a better mother. Though we will never know why the Lord took her from us, I find comfort knowing she is in Heaven, where she is no longer suffering side effects of chemo or experiencing anxiety. She said in the beginning of this experience that she has had a perfect life and has always been so grateful for everything. Not many of us can say that. So while of course we will be sad and will miss her beautiful smile, contagious laugh, amazing advice, we know she is with us and we take comfort in knowing that God is in control and that He has a plan, even if we cannot understand it right now. We will not fall apart because she taught us how to be a family--how to put one another's needs above our own and how to stick together no matter what. Each day will be a challenge, but I will always think to myself "what would mom tell me right now?" And I know that the answer will come to me. If there is anything that I would hope others could learn from our experience, it would be to treat your family and friends right, trust God, and appreciate every single day you have on Earth. We love you mom and will strive to be like you and make you proud every day!
The LORD is my shepherd,
I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
He restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.
Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
This morning my mom went to Jesus and God. She was not in pain when she went. My dad was by her side praying and told her if God was calling to her then she could go. She went soon after. She was not in pain because they intubated her yesterday and had her on sedatives. They said she could probably hear us. I know that she knows how much each of us love her. I didn't feel like there was anything I could have said to her that she already didn't know. She was the most kind, caring, beautiful person I have ever met and ever will meet. I think of all of the selfless things she did for our family and how much she taught each one of us. She was so moral, a genuinely GOOD person and a wonderful teacher. I am proud to call her my mother and will aspire to be like her every day that I live. She was the kind of person who would drop off Christmas gifts anonymously to a student in her class who was going through a hard time. Or go out of her way to make an unconfident student feel special and beautiful. She truly touched and changed lives every day that she lived.
Emily today said that each of us has a piece of her in us. Emily has her nurturing, empathetic qualities that made her so kind to others. Dani has her knack for making things beautiful and special with attention to detail and creativity. I like to think I have some of her ability to give advice to others in need. My dad has all of her and will continue to teach us things we never knew about her before. I find comfort in being with her mother, my Nana, who always knows what to say and my Pop-pop who she got her sense of humor from. Her brother Brian is funny like her and has so many similar traits that remind me of her. These people are so special because they are a piece of her.
I truly know that above all my mom wants us to be happy. That has been her goal since the day I was born. I could not ask for a better mother. Though we will never know why the Lord took her from us, I find comfort knowing she is in Heaven, where she is no longer suffering side effects of chemo or experiencing anxiety. She said in the beginning of this experience that she has had a perfect life and has always been so grateful for everything. Not many of us can say that. So while of course we will be sad and will miss her beautiful smile, contagious laugh, amazing advice, we know she is with us and we take comfort in knowing that God is in control and that He has a plan, even if we cannot understand it right now. We will not fall apart because she taught us how to be a family--how to put one another's needs above our own and how to stick together no matter what. Each day will be a challenge, but I will always think to myself "what would mom tell me right now?" And I know that the answer will come to me. If there is anything that I would hope others could learn from our experience, it would be to treat your family and friends right, trust God, and appreciate every single day you have on Earth. We love you mom and will strive to be like you and make you proud every day!
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Day +10
Matthew 21:21 Jesus answered them, "Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only will you do what has been done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ it will be done. 21:22 Whatever you ask for in prayer with faith, you will receive."
If ever we have needed your prayers, it is now. At about 6 this morning my mom began breathing heavily. Her heart rate has been around 150, very high. She lost consciousness but luckily my dad stayed the night last night so he was here for her. Her stomach is still huring and is very swollen. She has gained a lot of weight from retaining fluids. They have her stabalized now an she is on oxygen since she is having so much trouble breathing. She is able to mumble a little but also seems a little confused. We are all here now with her and my aunt Alicia and uncle Dennis are still here. My aunt Wendy is on her way. Dani is at school and we obviously don't want to upset her or have her worry.
So the current plan is to move my mom to ICU where they can closely monitor her. They will be slowly giving her a diuretic to get the extra fluid out of her body, which will hopefully get rid of the fluids in her lungs. They are also going to do a sonogram on her liver to tell if she has a complication called veno occlusive disease of the liver. It seems she may have this because her liver enzyme levels are heightened. They also see a slight change in her kidneys. Her heart sounds good and strong though. The breathing is what is causing the high heart rate we think. If this is VOD, her doctor said he has a lot of experience using a drug to treat it. The drug is not approved by the FDA in the US but is use in europe.
My mom is a fighter. She is tough and is still trying to get herself to sit up. She does have a lot of anxiety obviously, as do we all. She is such an amazing, wonderful, beautiful person who does not deserve to be going through any of this. We all love her more than words could ever say. Nothing is impossible with God. So please ask him to pull her through this.
Update: The doctors don't think it is VOD because her liver looks healthy. They now think it is some kind of infection or the mucositis that has caused her intestines to become "leaky." They see that fluid has leaked from her stomach and or intestines into her body, which is probably why her lungs have fluid in them. She is in a lot of discomfort so they have decided to intubate her, meaning she will be on a breathing tube. She will be sedated during this so they can do all the tests necessary and give her medications. Please continue to pray.
If ever we have needed your prayers, it is now. At about 6 this morning my mom began breathing heavily. Her heart rate has been around 150, very high. She lost consciousness but luckily my dad stayed the night last night so he was here for her. Her stomach is still huring and is very swollen. She has gained a lot of weight from retaining fluids. They have her stabalized now an she is on oxygen since she is having so much trouble breathing. She is able to mumble a little but also seems a little confused. We are all here now with her and my aunt Alicia and uncle Dennis are still here. My aunt Wendy is on her way. Dani is at school and we obviously don't want to upset her or have her worry.
So the current plan is to move my mom to ICU where they can closely monitor her. They will be slowly giving her a diuretic to get the extra fluid out of her body, which will hopefully get rid of the fluids in her lungs. They are also going to do a sonogram on her liver to tell if she has a complication called veno occlusive disease of the liver. It seems she may have this because her liver enzyme levels are heightened. They also see a slight change in her kidneys. Her heart sounds good and strong though. The breathing is what is causing the high heart rate we think. If this is VOD, her doctor said he has a lot of experience using a drug to treat it. The drug is not approved by the FDA in the US but is use in europe.
My mom is a fighter. She is tough and is still trying to get herself to sit up. She does have a lot of anxiety obviously, as do we all. She is such an amazing, wonderful, beautiful person who does not deserve to be going through any of this. We all love her more than words could ever say. Nothing is impossible with God. So please ask him to pull her through this.
Update: The doctors don't think it is VOD because her liver looks healthy. They now think it is some kind of infection or the mucositis that has caused her intestines to become "leaky." They see that fluid has leaked from her stomach and or intestines into her body, which is probably why her lungs have fluid in them. She is in a lot of discomfort so they have decided to intubate her, meaning she will be on a breathing tube. She will be sedated during this so they can do all the tests necessary and give her medications. Please continue to pray.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Day +9
It feels like we have hit a little bump in the road today. My mom is still not feeling good. She has stomach cramps and mouth pain. She has also gained a lot of weight and the doctors are not sure why. Her stomach is swollen. They said the stomach pain may be caused by mucositis, which is inflammation and ulcers of the lining of the digestive system. That's what causes the mouth sores also. They say the weight gain may be just from all the fluids. We are hoping it's nothing more than that, but they will be watching to make sure it has nothing to do with her liver or kidneys. She is on a lot of antibiotics because she has fevers. They give her many general antibiotics that fight off any infections or bacteria since her white blood cells are basically at 0.
Please, please pray that this is not anything serious and that she begins feeling better soon. God is watching over her and hears all of our prayers. The donor's cells should begin to engraft soon (settle into her bone marrow) and begin making blood cells. That's the next stage of this process.
Please, please pray that this is not anything serious and that she begins feeling better soon. God is watching over her and hears all of our prayers. The donor's cells should begin to engraft soon (settle into her bone marrow) and begin making blood cells. That's the next stage of this process.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Day +8
My dad said it seems like my mom is feeling slightly better today! My dad's cousins Alicia and Dennis came to help him and to keep him company. It's hard being at the hospital all day every day... My mom was able to shower and change today with my Aunt Alicia's help, which she really hasn't had the energy to do all week. So it is good to know that she is able to move around a little. My dad also said she talked a little bit, which she also hasn't done in a few days. She has been running some fevers (very normal for this process) and still has the stomach cramping but it might be getting better. A doctor told my dad that around Day 14 she should be feeling a lot better. It cannot come soon enough! I can't wait to have her home in hopefully a week and a half or two weeks.
Friday, March 2, 2012
Day +6
No changes today. She is still nauseous. They are going to give her pain meds for the mouth sores and try the behind the ear patch again for nausea. I guess she said she would ether hallucinate than be this sick. Hoping this gets better soon.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Day +5
My mom is still having a hard time :(. She has developed the mouth sores and has been throwing up. My dad is at the hospital with her and stayed in a hotel last night because of the snow storm. Thank you to the employees at my mom's school for the money so that my dad could get a hotel room! Please pray for my mom's pain to subside and for her to get better. This has been very difficult for her, and she is really sensitive to medication--each med they give her causes other awful side effects. Everything she is experiencing right now is "normal" according to the doctors. We just hope she begins to feel better soon.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Day +3
Unfortunately my mom isn't feeling too great today. She had a methotrexate chemo treatment today so this is probably why she's not feeling well. She was able to shower and eat a little bit though, which is good. Her mouth is becoming sore due to mucositis beginning. The doctor said she is doing well and her blood counts are right where they should be though. Some days will be better than others, but she will get through this!
Monday, February 27, 2012
Day +2
Just a quick update.. My mom had a great day today (as best as could be expected). She was able to walk and eat and talk on the phone. So grateful! Let's hope for a good day tomorrow also. She is starting to get a few canker sores unfortunately but not too bad. They are goin to start her on the IV nutrition tonight because she is losing too much weight. This way they can make sure she gets adequate calories and nutrition.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Day +1
Well today is not a great day for my mom unfortunately. I guess these are considered the "icky" days. She has been throwing up and has a stomach ache. My dad is there with her now and she has been sleeping mostly. She hasn't been able to eat anything. The doctors came in and reassured her that this is very normal and is from a variety of things--antibiotics, chemo, stem cells, etc. Hopefully she will feel better soon.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Day 0 (again)
I guess today is considered the actual Day 0 since she didn't receive the stem cells until 2:30 am. As expected, it was very uneventful (thankfully)! Em is headed to the hospital and the rest of us will go in a little while. My mom said she is tired today, but she was up late getting the cells. The side effects will most likely begin tomorrow or in the next few days, but will be similar to all chemo side effects she has already experienced. Here is a picture of the stem cells and the prayer that the chaplain said before my mom received them.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Day 0
Today is the day that my mom will receive stem cells from a complete stranger! They should arrive around 6pm and she will probably receive them around 8 tonight. Her doctor says the process will be very uneventful, with a small chance of chills or a slight fever, but this is very unlikely. My mom is feeling pretty good. She has been able to eat and laugh. We are hoping the mouth sores don't come so she can continue to eat.
I can't believe we are finally at this point. While I try not to think of the past few months, it's hard to forget how I felt when my mom was first diagnosed. Our lives changed so much in October. Hearing the oncologist's plan for my mom seemed overwhelming, impossible. I pictured our family standing at the bottom of a huge, rocky mountain looking up. How would we ever get to the top? I had to stop focusing on the top and the future, and focus only on each day, each step to the top of that mountain and put it in God's hands. I think that is a lesson that everyone needs to learn at some point, because we really only have today. Not a single one of us is guaranteed a tomorrow. We can only focus on today and enjoy each hour we have together. Of course it is only human to worry and wonder about the future, but when I find myself worrying I remember the bible verse Matthew 6:27, "Can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your lifespan?" We can't! Each day the peak of that mountain seems closer and closer, and today it feels reachable. I picture us reaching that peak soon, in a few months when things begin to feel normal, and then hanging out there for a while, enjoying the view!
I am so thankful for every little miracle God has given us to help us climb this mountain. He has put a selfless donor who is a match for my mom on Earth. He gave my dad a job in NH, where we have access to some of the best healthcare in the world. He gave my best friend Kellagh (and really one of my parents' best friends also) a job at the same hospital that my mom has spent so much time in so that we could have someone to help us stay positive and bring my mom breakfast in the mornings. He put us in contact with David, who also had double hit lymphoma and a stem cell transplant and was treated at Dana Farber, to provide us with information and so much hope. He put my mom in contact with Marie, a woman in our town who had a transplant a few months ago and has been in touch and offered advice to my mom about the transplant procedure, and made her feel like it wasn't so bad. And He gave us wonderful friends and family to make this process easier. There are so many more little blessings, really too many to list!
Thank you all for your continued support and love! My mom is almost to the top!
I can't believe we are finally at this point. While I try not to think of the past few months, it's hard to forget how I felt when my mom was first diagnosed. Our lives changed so much in October. Hearing the oncologist's plan for my mom seemed overwhelming, impossible. I pictured our family standing at the bottom of a huge, rocky mountain looking up. How would we ever get to the top? I had to stop focusing on the top and the future, and focus only on each day, each step to the top of that mountain and put it in God's hands. I think that is a lesson that everyone needs to learn at some point, because we really only have today. Not a single one of us is guaranteed a tomorrow. We can only focus on today and enjoy each hour we have together. Of course it is only human to worry and wonder about the future, but when I find myself worrying I remember the bible verse Matthew 6:27, "Can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your lifespan?" We can't! Each day the peak of that mountain seems closer and closer, and today it feels reachable. I picture us reaching that peak soon, in a few months when things begin to feel normal, and then hanging out there for a while, enjoying the view!
I am so thankful for every little miracle God has given us to help us climb this mountain. He has put a selfless donor who is a match for my mom on Earth. He gave my dad a job in NH, where we have access to some of the best healthcare in the world. He gave my best friend Kellagh (and really one of my parents' best friends also) a job at the same hospital that my mom has spent so much time in so that we could have someone to help us stay positive and bring my mom breakfast in the mornings. He put us in contact with David, who also had double hit lymphoma and a stem cell transplant and was treated at Dana Farber, to provide us with information and so much hope. He put my mom in contact with Marie, a woman in our town who had a transplant a few months ago and has been in touch and offered advice to my mom about the transplant procedure, and made her feel like it wasn't so bad. And He gave us wonderful friends and family to make this process easier. There are so many more little blessings, really too many to list!
Thank you all for your continued support and love! My mom is almost to the top!
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Day -2
Hi everyone! My mom is doing much better today, although I have to tell you she was freaking me and Emily out telling us about her hallucinations last night. She still thinks there really were "little bugs with glowing lights making elegant arrangements for themselves in the trees" last night. She also had some visitors from "transformers." Poor thing, my dad got here this morning and she had the iPad next to her and had googled headlice. My dad doesn't seem to think much of the dream, he just goes along with everything she tells him. Emily and I said if my mom were in college and told us about her hallucinations, it would sound like she had a good night! LOL!
She is still somewhat nauseous but is up and reading all of the kind emails from all of you! Thank you to all who sent them! Know that she is reading them. They took the patch behind her ear off and think that's what was causing the hallucinations. It's nice to hear her talking. We know she is definitely feeling better. Today and tomorrow will be resting days and the donor's cells will be here Friday or Saturday. They will fly in to Logan airport in a red cooler. Pretty cool! I pray for the donor and that the donor's cells are good, strong and healthy and will take over my mom's immune system and fight whatever bits of cancer might be left! We don't know really what to expect after the transplant. Everyone responds difficulty. Hopefully my mom will have very few side effects. David has been amazing trough this process. I text him daily to ask if things are normal and if he had the same side effects. We are meeting him for lunch today because he is here for his biweekly check up. Thanks David!!
We got 2 big meals, panera bread, and a beautiful cake from our favorite pastry shop from Dani's school nurse today. It really made my and Emily's day! Thank you Mrs. Sheehan!!
She is still somewhat nauseous but is up and reading all of the kind emails from all of you! Thank you to all who sent them! Know that she is reading them. They took the patch behind her ear off and think that's what was causing the hallucinations. It's nice to hear her talking. We know she is definitely feeling better. Today and tomorrow will be resting days and the donor's cells will be here Friday or Saturday. They will fly in to Logan airport in a red cooler. Pretty cool! I pray for the donor and that the donor's cells are good, strong and healthy and will take over my mom's immune system and fight whatever bits of cancer might be left! We don't know really what to expect after the transplant. Everyone responds difficulty. Hopefully my mom will have very few side effects. David has been amazing trough this process. I text him daily to ask if things are normal and if he had the same side effects. We are meeting him for lunch today because he is here for his biweekly check up. Thanks David!!
We got 2 big meals, panera bread, and a beautiful cake from our favorite pastry shop from Dani's school nurse today. It really made my and Emily's day! Thank you Mrs. Sheehan!!
Day -2
Hi everyone! My mom is doing much better today, although I have to tell you she was freaking me and Emily out telling us about her hallucinations last night. She still thinks there really were "little bugs with glowing lights making elegant arrangements for themselves in the trees" last night. She also had some visitors from "transformers." Poor thing, my dad got here this morning and she had the iPad next to her and had googled headlice. My dad doesn't seem to think much of the dream, he just goes along with everything she tells him. Emily and I said if my mom were in college and told us about her hallucinations, it would sound like she had a good night! LOL!
She is still somewhat nauseous but is up and reading all of the kind emails from all of you! Thank you to all who sent them! Know that she is reading them. They took the patch behind her ear off and think that's what was causing the hallucinations. It's nice to hear her talking. We know she is definitely feeling better. Today a tomorrow will be resting days and the donor's cells will be here Friday or Saturday. They will fly in to Logan airport in a red cooler. Pretty cool! I pray for the donor and that the donor's cells are good, strong and healthy and will take over my mom's immune system and fight whatever bits of cancer that might be left! We don't know really what to expect after the transplant. Everyone responds difficulty. Hopefully my mom will have very few side effects. David has been amazing trough this process. I text him daily to ask if things are normal and if he had the same side effects. Thanks David!!
She is still somewhat nauseous but is up and reading all of the kind emails from all of you! Thank you to all who sent them! Know that she is reading them. They took the patch behind her ear off and think that's what was causing the hallucinations. It's nice to hear her talking. We know she is definitely feeling better. Today a tomorrow will be resting days and the donor's cells will be here Friday or Saturday. They will fly in to Logan airport in a red cooler. Pretty cool! I pray for the donor and that the donor's cells are good, strong and healthy and will take over my mom's immune system and fight whatever bits of cancer that might be left! We don't know really what to expect after the transplant. Everyone responds difficulty. Hopefully my mom will have very few side effects. David has been amazing trough this process. I text him daily to ask if things are normal and if he had the same side effects. Thanks David!!
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Day -3
My mom seems to be feeling better today. She is still throwing up but is able to talk a little bit. She is still sleeping through the day. She decided she would rather have the nausea than take the Ativan again because it gives her horrible dreams and hallucinations. The doctor said she should be feeling better by tomorrow.
Special thanks from the Spicer girls to Mary, Lyn, and St. Chris school community for the food you have made for us! It makes things so much easier to not have to worry about grocery shopping and cooking.
Special thanks from the Spicer girls to Mary, Lyn, and St. Chris school community for the food you have made for us! It makes things so much easier to not have to worry about grocery shopping and cooking.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Day -4
Today has been another rough day for my mom. They finally got her nausea and vomiting under control. Yesterday she was pretty much throwing up every hour. If she wasn't throwing up, she was sleeping and not able to talk much. She finally said she would try Ativan, which she previously thought she might be allergic to. It helped a lot with the nausea though, and she didn't throw up again after. They also used a patch behind her ear to control the nausea. I just talked to my dad and he said she just threw up again because they hadn't given her the Ativan since last night but just gave it to her again. Unfortunately, although it helps a lot with the nausea, it makes her really groggy and out of it... She has been saying things that don't make sense. The nurse said if my dad leaves they have to put her on bed alert so they know if she gets up. This might not be the worst thing since she most likely will not remember today.
The good news is that today is the last day of chemo. I'm guessing she is receiving the last bag right now. Then she will have 3 days to recover. Hopefully the mouth sores don't come, but she hasn't been able to keep up with the mouth care these past two days. I don't know that it honestly helps that much anyway. They seem inevitable. The donor's cells will arrive on Friday. Keep praying for a smooth transplant process!
The good news is that today is the last day of chemo. I'm guessing she is receiving the last bag right now. Then she will have 3 days to recover. Hopefully the mouth sores don't come, but she hasn't been able to keep up with the mouth care these past two days. I don't know that it honestly helps that much anyway. They seem inevitable. The donor's cells will arrive on Friday. Keep praying for a smooth transplant process!
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Day -5
My mom is still getting chemo each day and is starting to feel the side effects today unfortunately. She has some nausea and a stomach ache. Yesterday she got moved to a bigger room and thankfully it has a view of the sky and gets a lot of sun. That was the one thing she hoped for. Getting a room with sunlight is difficult to do here! Not much other news. I think she will spend a lot of the day sleeping today.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Day -7
Chemo has begun. She will receive 2 bags of chemo for the next 4 days. Not much action here today though. We will be hoping she does not get any nausea. Emails are welcome, as she is pretty bored!! Juliespicer17@yahoo.com she's been sitting around on her computer today. She's also trying to get in touch with the lady in the room beside her who is going through the exact same process. We are so thankful to people like David and Marie who have been through the transplant process and are always ready to answer our questions. Thank you!!!
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Day -8
To be spiritually minded is life and peace.
Romans 8:6
Today is considered Day -8 because it is 8 days before my mom receives the donor's cells. The day she gets them is called Day 0. She went in today to have a Hickman placed in her chest. It is a type of port that is placed in the chest, under the skin. It will be used to infuse the donor cells and also if she needs IV Nutrition if she is unable to eat. Her surgery went well and she is now going to her hospital room. Tomorrow will be day 1 of her 4 days of chemo. Then she will have 3 days off and will receive the donor's cells on the 24th. The purpose of the chemo is to knock her immune system so low that it can be replaced by the donor's. The side effects will unfortunately be similar to the ones she has had before. Mouth sores and nausea are common.
The doctor decided to go with the 26 year old donor because she had a few things that matched better (nothing crucial). There were very few differences between her and the 19 year old. We only know her age and that she is from Europe. We are so grateful to her!!! Her cells will be collected from her arm and shipped to the US immediately where my mom will receive them. The transplant itself is very uneventful. It usually takes about 1 hour and is pretty much the same as a blood transfusion. Who would have known?! After that, the donor's cells should begin to engraft in my mom's body over the next few days/weeks and start to build all new blood cells. The stem cells know exactly where to go (inside the bones) and what to do once they are placed in the body.
Because my mom basically will have no immune system, only immediate family can visit her in the hospital room, and we will have to wear gloves and masks. She is only allowed to eat food from the hospital or microwavable meals (no fruits or veggies). Everything also has to be individually wrapped because once it's open it has to be thrown away. The doctor said if you can go to a grocery store and blow the dust off of it, she can have it. The more preservatives the better apparently. Seems strange to us but there can be no risk of bacteria or food-borne illness. The restrictions lessen after 100 days and we can cook certain things for her once she comes home.
I will keep you all updated (hopefully everyday). I have become so appreciative of every second we get to spend with one another. My mom is doing really well and is laughing and joking all the time! My dad is pretty comical, so how could she not? We will take it day by day and be grateful for even the littlest things each day. I bought my dad a devotional this Christmas, and while feeling low today looked at the entry for February 16th. I thought it was worth sharing because it reminded me to stay spiritually-minded and to think positively. We can't change the circumstances, but we can change our response and attitude!
"Spirit-filled men and women are not isolated from what's going on around them... They experience hurt and disappointment like everybody else. What sets them apart from the rest of the world is their response. When circumstances wreak havoc with the peace of the Spirit-filled people, there will be some downtime. But they won't stay down. They refocus their attention on the big picture, acknowledge the truth that their peace is from the Lord, and then move on... They know that 'the mind set on the things of the Spirit is life and peace.'"
Romans 8:6
Today is considered Day -8 because it is 8 days before my mom receives the donor's cells. The day she gets them is called Day 0. She went in today to have a Hickman placed in her chest. It is a type of port that is placed in the chest, under the skin. It will be used to infuse the donor cells and also if she needs IV Nutrition if she is unable to eat. Her surgery went well and she is now going to her hospital room. Tomorrow will be day 1 of her 4 days of chemo. Then she will have 3 days off and will receive the donor's cells on the 24th. The purpose of the chemo is to knock her immune system so low that it can be replaced by the donor's. The side effects will unfortunately be similar to the ones she has had before. Mouth sores and nausea are common.
The doctor decided to go with the 26 year old donor because she had a few things that matched better (nothing crucial). There were very few differences between her and the 19 year old. We only know her age and that she is from Europe. We are so grateful to her!!! Her cells will be collected from her arm and shipped to the US immediately where my mom will receive them. The transplant itself is very uneventful. It usually takes about 1 hour and is pretty much the same as a blood transfusion. Who would have known?! After that, the donor's cells should begin to engraft in my mom's body over the next few days/weeks and start to build all new blood cells. The stem cells know exactly where to go (inside the bones) and what to do once they are placed in the body.
Because my mom basically will have no immune system, only immediate family can visit her in the hospital room, and we will have to wear gloves and masks. She is only allowed to eat food from the hospital or microwavable meals (no fruits or veggies). Everything also has to be individually wrapped because once it's open it has to be thrown away. The doctor said if you can go to a grocery store and blow the dust off of it, she can have it. The more preservatives the better apparently. Seems strange to us but there can be no risk of bacteria or food-borne illness. The restrictions lessen after 100 days and we can cook certain things for her once she comes home.
I will keep you all updated (hopefully everyday). I have become so appreciative of every second we get to spend with one another. My mom is doing really well and is laughing and joking all the time! My dad is pretty comical, so how could she not? We will take it day by day and be grateful for even the littlest things each day. I bought my dad a devotional this Christmas, and while feeling low today looked at the entry for February 16th. I thought it was worth sharing because it reminded me to stay spiritually-minded and to think positively. We can't change the circumstances, but we can change our response and attitude!
"Spirit-filled men and women are not isolated from what's going on around them... They experience hurt and disappointment like everybody else. What sets them apart from the rest of the world is their response. When circumstances wreak havoc with the peace of the Spirit-filled people, there will be some downtime. But they won't stay down. They refocus their attention on the big picture, acknowledge the truth that their peace is from the Lord, and then move on... They know that 'the mind set on the things of the Spirit is life and peace.'"
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Feb 12
Just a quick update... My
Mom is feeling pretty good and has gained about 6lbs in a little over a week!! Those milkshakes and waffles have really been working! That gives her some relief about the transplant because she feels like she is healthier and has some extra weight on her now. Her spirits are really good also. She's laughing and up and moving. My pop-pop has been helping us get things clean before the transplant. We had to wash all curtains and box up things that collect dust. We are all just enjoying having my mom home. We will keep the blog updated more when she has the transplant. Keep praying!
Mom is feeling pretty good and has gained about 6lbs in a little over a week!! Those milkshakes and waffles have really been working! That gives her some relief about the transplant because she feels like she is healthier and has some extra weight on her now. Her spirits are really good also. She's laughing and up and moving. My pop-pop has been helping us get things clean before the transplant. We had to wash all curtains and box up things that collect dust. We are all just enjoying having my mom home. We will keep the blog updated more when she has the transplant. Keep praying!
Friday, February 10, 2012
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Feb 1
In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18
We are happy to say that my mom is finally coming home today! They thought the antibiotics might have been the cause of her fevers, so once her white blood cells were high enough, they took her off of them and watched her for 24 hours. She still had a slight temperature but nothing compared to the 101-103 degrees she had been running before. The highest it got was 100.4. If it reached 100.5 she wouldn't have been discharged yet. So thank goodness!
We also received more good news today. Because of fevers, they did a CT scan to look for any source of infection. Based on those CT scans, her oncologist said he doesn't feel that they need to do a PET scan (which shows if there is any active cancer cells in the body) because he strongly believes she is in remission! That means no tumors on the lymph nodes-they are all significantly smaller. This is great news!
So the next steps are to have a bone marrow biopsy (to check if the cancer is out of her bone marrow) next week and to meet with the bone marrow specialist to discuss the transplant. The donor has not been medically cleared yet. I guess it takes a while for all of the testing for the donor. We do know that her donor is now a 19 year old girl. I guess something fell through with the 22 year old. Luckily, the 19 year old is the same type of match and has 7/8 of the matching characteristics that they look for.
For the next few weeks, we will be helping my mom to gain some weight and also to build some muscle back. It is really important that she goes into the transplant strong and healthy. Having extra weight will help her to fight infection. Since her chemo has been so harsh, she has lost about 20 lbs and a lot of muscle from not moving around too much. So hopefully the weather will be nice enough that we can go for walks outside. Ideally, she will put on about 10 lbs. She has requested blueberry cobbler with ice cream or banana pudding tonight and Emily's fried eggplant with pasta. The dietitian at the hospital gave us some tips on adding calories to food. We will be adding butter to everything she eats!
These trying times make us all so thankful for each good day. I know this stay has been tough for my mom because she has wanted to be home so badly. I give her so much credit because as hard as it is, she tries to find little things to be thankful for each day. She has a lot of anxiety about the transplant, but she is doing a good job of taking everything day by day and focusing on small goals like coming back home.Please keep praying for a smooth bone marrow transplant and strength, both physical and mental, for her!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Jan 30
Still in the hospital unfortunately... She has been running fevers still. Her white blood cells are at .51 and need to get to 1 for her to come home and to have to fevers for 24 hours. So it's just more sitting and waiting. Trying to keep her positive!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Jan 25
Sorry for not writing in a while... things have been busy around here. My mom went back to the hospital on Friday for some blood work. Unfortunately, during that time she had a slight fever, so they decided to keep her there. She has been there since :( It's hard because she wants to be home. Ever since then she has been running fevers. They don't know what the cause is but they keep trying different general antibiotics to fight off whatever it might be. She won't be able to leave until her while blood cells go up high enough that her body can fight on its own. We need your prayers...PLEASE pray that her white blood cells go up so that she can spend some time at home before the transplant. Her spirits are good and she is talking and moving around normally thankfully, but she really wants to get out of the hospital!
We don't have much news on the transplant yet. They are thinking it will be around the second or third week of February. We have been in touch with a boy who had the same thing as my mom and had a transplant 3 months ago. He had slight issues with the transplant (from his body rejecting the donor's cells) but overall he is doing good. He also was treated at Dana Farber. He is only 21 and is so positive. It has been a blessing to be in contact with him. Please keep him in your prayers also! We hope to meet him soon!
We don't have much news on the transplant yet. They are thinking it will be around the second or third week of February. We have been in touch with a boy who had the same thing as my mom and had a transplant 3 months ago. He had slight issues with the transplant (from his body rejecting the donor's cells) but overall he is doing good. He also was treated at Dana Farber. He is only 21 and is so positive. It has been a blessing to be in contact with him. Please keep him in your prayers also! We hope to meet him soon!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Jan 17
All things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
Romans 8:28
My mom is on her way home finally! She is feeling a little better today. We will hope for no fevers and a peaceful few weeks at home before the transplant. She will have to go in at some point for scans to make sure she is in remission before that. Please pray that all of the cancer is gone so that they can do the transplant! She has gotten through one chapter of this. Now the next one will begin. Thank you all for your support and prayers! We know God is hearing them!!
Romans 8:28
My mom is on her way home finally! She is feeling a little better today. We will hope for no fevers and a peaceful few weeks at home before the transplant. She will have to go in at some point for scans to make sure she is in remission before that. Please pray that all of the cancer is gone so that they can do the transplant! She has gotten through one chapter of this. Now the next one will begin. Thank you all for your support and prayers! We know God is hearing them!!
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Jan 15
Not much to update you all on today. My mom is still pretty miserable. We went to Boston for Emily's birthday today and she was barely talking because she is still really nauseous. Hopefully she will improve tomorrow. She has her last chemo at 5am. Once she has recovered she can come home. But we have learned from last time that we won't have her discharged unless she is able to eat and stay hydrated. It's not worth the risk otherwise.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Jan 14
Hi everyone, my mom is still at the hospital. She got chemo this morning but will have a break for 24 hours. Yesterday was rough though. She was very nauseous and her face was extremely swollen from all the fluids. I went to the hospital yesterday. My dad has been staying with her every night. Emily will be going today. Maybe if my mom is feeling ok my dad can come home and shower/rest. He said she is feeling a little better today, so that's good news!
This past week I have been in contact with some people who have experience with the same kind of lymphoma as my mom. We have heard some really encouraging stories! I am so grateful for others' experiences and their willingness to share their stories. Since this type of lymphoma has really only very recently been recognized, it's difficult to find others who have been through or are going through the same thing. Once we are through this I know our family will reach out to others to provide encouragement!
We now know the donor is a 22 year old female. That is all we will know for at least a year though. Please pray for my mom's transplant AND for her donor, who has decided to selflessly donate her stem cells!
God presents himself every day in our lives. From putting me in touch with others who are going through the same thing to sending us little messages when we are feeling down, He is with us!
This past week I have been in contact with some people who have experience with the same kind of lymphoma as my mom. We have heard some really encouraging stories! I am so grateful for others' experiences and their willingness to share their stories. Since this type of lymphoma has really only very recently been recognized, it's difficult to find others who have been through or are going through the same thing. Once we are through this I know our family will reach out to others to provide encouragement!
We now know the donor is a 22 year old female. That is all we will know for at least a year though. Please pray for my mom's transplant AND for her donor, who has decided to selflessly donate her stem cells!
God presents himself every day in our lives. From putting me in touch with others who are going through the same thing to sending us little messages when we are feeling down, He is with us!
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Jan 11
Hi everyone, my mom just started chemo even though her platelets are still low. I guess they aren't too concerned and would rather get the chemo moving along. Please pray that this last treatment goes smoothly and that she isn't in too much pain. It is a 5 day inpatient treatment. So she will be there for at least 5 days. I will keep you updated.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Jan 10
Quick update: my mom will be going in some time tomorrow. She's feeling good lately though and has more energy. I will keep you all updated!
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Jan 8
Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.
Exodus 14:13-14
Hello everyone! For those who don't know, my mom ended up being sent home the day after checking in at the hospital because her platelets were too low to begin chemo. Her oncologist wants her to go get her blood checked tomorrow morning to see if her platelets have increased and then will schedule when to have her come in. Most likely they will admit her tomorrow. Even if her platelets are still too low he said they will begin chemo because they are not too worried about her bone marrow since she will be having a transplant. He told us they do have a donor for her who has 11 out of 12 matched traits. He said the unmatched trait is not a critical one though. So that is good news. He also told us that even though she feels like she's had a horrible time with chemo, she is doing very well treatment-wise!
My mom is feeling really good. Over the past 3 days she has been able to go to lunch with my dad's aunt and uncle, go to Home Goods, and go for a walk! She gets pretty tired afterwards but that's expected with this chemo. We are glad she had the extra couple of days to gain more of her strength before the next chemo.
We also asked her doctor about the plans for the scans to see if she is in remission. He said she will have a bone marrow biopsy and a PET scan at the end of the month. Praying that it will all be gone! Then the transplant will take place sometime in early or mid-February.
I will keep you all updated when she begins her last round of chemo! Keep praying!
Exodus 14:13-14
Hello everyone! For those who don't know, my mom ended up being sent home the day after checking in at the hospital because her platelets were too low to begin chemo. Her oncologist wants her to go get her blood checked tomorrow morning to see if her platelets have increased and then will schedule when to have her come in. Most likely they will admit her tomorrow. Even if her platelets are still too low he said they will begin chemo because they are not too worried about her bone marrow since she will be having a transplant. He told us they do have a donor for her who has 11 out of 12 matched traits. He said the unmatched trait is not a critical one though. So that is good news. He also told us that even though she feels like she's had a horrible time with chemo, she is doing very well treatment-wise!
My mom is feeling really good. Over the past 3 days she has been able to go to lunch with my dad's aunt and uncle, go to Home Goods, and go for a walk! She gets pretty tired afterwards but that's expected with this chemo. We are glad she had the extra couple of days to gain more of her strength before the next chemo.
We also asked her doctor about the plans for the scans to see if she is in remission. He said she will have a bone marrow biopsy and a PET scan at the end of the month. Praying that it will all be gone! Then the transplant will take place sometime in early or mid-February.
I will keep you all updated when she begins her last round of chemo! Keep praying!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Jan 3
Hope everyone had a good holiday. We did! My mom started feeling much better a few days after Christmas, and it was wonderful to have her home!! The doctors want her back to the hospital tomorrow to start her last round of chemo. It's a 5 day inpatient treatment. So she is pretty bummed to have to be going back. We are trying to keep her thinking positively even though none of us can imagine what she is going through. Right when she is feeling better she will how to go through being sick again. However, it is almost over.
The doctor told my dad they do have a match for my mom, but we don't know any details or if it is a perfect match yet. I think we will find out tomorrow or the next day. I have been in touch with a wonderful and positive woman who lives in our town and had a bone marrow transplant for non hodgkins lymphoma about 2 months ago. She is so upbeat and positive! She told me she goes for mile walks outside and tries to stay active. That was uplifting to know she is able to go outside and is feeling pretty good. Her son was a donor for her because she did not have a match in the registry. My mom is going to email her today. Thanks to everyone for your support, especially during the holidays!
The doctor told my dad they do have a match for my mom, but we don't know any details or if it is a perfect match yet. I think we will find out tomorrow or the next day. I have been in touch with a wonderful and positive woman who lives in our town and had a bone marrow transplant for non hodgkins lymphoma about 2 months ago. She is so upbeat and positive! She told me she goes for mile walks outside and tries to stay active. That was uplifting to know she is able to go outside and is feeling pretty good. Her son was a donor for her because she did not have a match in the registry. My mom is going to email her today. Thanks to everyone for your support, especially during the holidays!
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